Wednesday, February 20, 2008


We got the apartment. It's a mile from my office. I won't be walking.

It's smaller than our house, but I think it'll be better. Two bedrooms, fireplace, pool, sauna, fitness room. I'm really excited about the fitness room. It's within walking distance of a supermarket, a pub, and a c-store. I can't think of anything else I'd need to be in such close proximity of, except maybe a strip club. I'd really like to live near a strip club.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Cleaning out

I threw stuff away today. I feel weird about it, empty and hollow. I have memories associated with everything, even the broken things. Things which are of no use to anyone, and do not function properly. I have two broken chairs in the garage; Waltzer gave me the chairs and a dining room table and the chairs have been broken for a long time. I sat at that table and cried after Colin died, when the table was in Waltzer's apartment, that terrific apartment over the shoppes where I spent so much time.

I've replaced the set, and now the table and broken chairs are taking up space in the garage. Of course I am not taking them to my new apartment, but when I threw them out I think my eyes leaked a little bit.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

I had to pull over on the side of the road and scream a little bit today. I can't make the static in my head stop, can't stop fretting over everything. All day today I wanted to come home and pack. Once I got here, all I wanted to do was sit and cry. I did neither of those things, and now I'm behind on both my packing and my crying.

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